Nappy Headed Black Child

So Earlier this week i got myself pulled into another Black Women v. Black Men argument...

Yeah i know....but i just had to say something b/c the fact of the matter is i like a good debate and when someone you love and respect starts to beat up on who you are, you get compelled to say something

In any case because i stayed on the sidelines because 1. i knew it was against my better judgement to even entertain it and 2. i was genuinely trying to gain such an understanding for all of the vitriol.

Well yall know how these arguments go. Heated and intense with neither side gaining any ground. As i was presenting my arguments about how blaming black men for media presentations concerning colorism (that they dont own or control) and ideas about skin color and value (that have been imprinted on them by white supremacy). I noticed i was getting upset because i love black women and i am faithful to black women. And despite my words my dedication and sincerity her i am being torn down. I literally sitting in front of my computer screen mad, indignant, about to launch in to a self righteous rant.

Then i stopped. Cuz at that moment i realized this is what it feels like to be invisible. To not be seen for the actions of others...now im aware of the concept of invisibility and how it applies when people make monolithic wholes of things but generally i either expect it or dont care enough about the person to acknowledge their thoughts. This time i felt invisible i experienced it. I felt that nothing i did mattered despite my most honest sincerity. Frankly it was painful and infuriating rolled all into this little ball of powerlessness. Now i understood where those words were coming from, a combination of anger powerlessness and truth. At that point the motivation to argue left me.

Reality is we can argue for years and years about how the problems became the problems. I want to fix them. I wanna make so that women wont care what media figures say about them because they know their men are at their backs to support them and I want the men who are warriors for their people to be seen and met with love instead of skepticism.